Five chapters done and dusted. Twenty five to go. Time for a coffee and a calm down. After documenting and reliving the trauma that was ‘The cot fire of 64’ I think I’ll throw a brandy in there too. I’ve also learnt something about myself. I can do solitude. So if the writing thing doesn’t work out, I can still work on my childhood dream of becoming an impoverished Nun
I really hope you are going to enjoy reading this book. As much as I am enjoying putting it together.
I must be weird, because I can’t stop laughing (and I know the ‘endings’!)
Most of the blog stories will be featured. But trust me, you won’t feel cheated when you part with your pennies. There are plenty of additional paragraphs to what you have read before and loads of previously unpublished stuff too.
After re-reading one such story ‘The curious case of Who threw number 3 down a flight of concrete steps?’ I’m actually amazed that I’m alive today to document these tales (such a punishment was totally uncalled for Mam, and it’s WRONG to always blame the Eldest!)
Anyway. Better get back to my Cabin in Vermont and get scribbling again.
When I say ‘Cabin and Vermont’ I actually mean ‘Cubby hole’ and ‘Blackley’ But that’s the Collyhurst girl in me. I can make owt from nowt.
Will keep you updated.Hope to have more info soon
I’ve managed to secure interest from a publisher. But that means I’m NOT allowed to post anymore of my stories …..I can understand the logic though……Why pay for something you can get free?
Anyway I am off to lock myself away to furiously write and rewrite. Obviously most of the ‘Blog’ stories will be in my book BUT plenty of NEW material too.
Tales to look forward to include: My war of nerves with the security guard at the C.I.S….. More tales of the never ending babies in our house…… Buying furniture with me Mam……Going bowling with Grandad and how I was the first ‘Coloured’ baby in Moston (me Mam exaggerates a bit!)
Thank you for your continued support…..Hopefully I can get this out for Christmas. So if you’re looking for a pressie for your Aunty Gladys. Forget Slippers and buy a copy of my book! … All proceeds go to my ‘Get out of the country quick when me Mam see’s all this’ Fund.
I will continue to post (Small!) teasers and updates of where I’m up to. So bear with me…..Hope to see you at the Book Launch…..or if not I’m usually to be found chatting my business at local bus stops throughout the Greater Manchester area.
Bye……but only for a while
A more up to date story and Testament to Mams consistency.
We’re sat in Ante-natal. Me, my Daughter (the Pregnant one) and Mam! Because she still gets to have ‘First Go’ in family matters
“Where you going? oooh! I’m coming too’!…….
We are here for the 16 week scan.
My daughter is expressing doubts about being a good parent. A normal worry for any first time Mum.
Before she replies, Mam looks around the waiting room. Not to see if there’s anyone about. It’s packed out!…. Nooooo! She wants to make sure that no-one there knows us. To people who know us. The neighbours, the Clubman, the Lollipop Lady. That sort of thing….To THEM she makes out we are practically perfect in every way……
“My Child would NEVER do something like that Mrs Harris. My kids are RAISED not DRAGGED UP. Now I suggest you P**S OFF”!
But all is well. The waiting room is full of strangers. Just the same as people at bus-stops…….only sitting!
“I wouldn’t worry about it darling grandaughter”
The Woman has a split personality!….My kids don’t believe me when I tell them how strict she was.
“What! Cuddly wuddly Nana who gives us Sweets and Toys. She could never be mean”
“Your Mum (ME!) was a CRAP parent at first. But Slowly, over the years she’s TRIED to improve”
My Daughters name is called over the Tannoy…..Thank God! She’ll have to shut up now.
My daughter walks across to the Examination room. Just as she’s about to go in. My Mam shouts out to her….. and you just know the whole of the waiting room is listening. She’s been gaily entertaining them for the last 20 minutes, with tales of cheating husbands and ungrateful children.
“Don’t forget to tell them your Mam is Half-Caste” she shouts, in her dulcet Foghorn. “Cos they have to check the Baby for that funny Blood thing”
(she means Sickle Cell!… I’m sinking lower and lower into my chair)
“But tell them I had your Mam tested and she was fine. Cos at the end of the day. Like I said to her Dad. I let you get away with cheating on me. But give my Child a disease and I’ll KILL YOU”……..
Sometime later, we are allowed in for our first glimpse of the Baby. Mam takes one look at the beautiful 16 week fetus onscreen and exclaims
“Oh My God! It’s got MY Nose” !